Zoya has been a bit emotional lately...maybe its due to all the new activities in her life....maybe its a stage....maybe she just wants to watch my hair turn grey overnight...whatever it may be its wearing me out! Things she used to love to do she is suddenly afraid of....and I'm learning my leg was made for her to glue herself to if I dare try to put her down. She has to be in our arms in any place we go into...so strange. I think she's figuring out she likes her mama and daddy the mostest and she no longer enjoys running up to strangers for hugs....I guess its not all bad LOL. So the past two weeks of school Zoya had a hard time with me leaving (she only goes once a week which could be part of the issue)...one day was REALLY ugly and I got in my car and cried. I could handle if she was pushing other kids or not listening....but crying for me not to leave her? RIP. MY. HEART. OUT! Well that really bad day I ended up picking her up from school sick so I think she was just trying to tell me she didn't feel up to going to school...poor bug :(
So last night I could feel the knots forming in my tummy worrying about the "drop off" today. It is so hard to see her so upset and crying and then I just leave her? It just stinks! So I prayed and prayed and prayed, I prayed instead of eating breakfast, I prayed while I packed her backpack, I prayed on the drive to school, and I prayed the whole way down the hall, trying to keep my heart from beating out of my chest. Really sounds dramatic but its true! LOL. This time instead of making her walk on her own (my "buck up and be a big girl" thoughts) I carried her into school and the whole way down the hall and held her while I signed her in and then walked into the classroom holding her and let HER tell ME when she was ready....a couple minutes and she was playing with the dollhouse with her teacher. She gave me a kiss and off I went...a happy mama with a happy girl!!! Her teacher reported that she had a good day, and only acted whiny or sad when she was told no LOL. I'm sure its not the end of the tears and not every day will go as smoothly but I'm feeling pretty happy that she didn't want to go home when I came to pick her up! Seriously I'd rather have that than her crying and upset because I'm leaving her. She had marker colored from head to toe when I picked her up...I think she got more on herself than on her paper...for sure! They said "she REALLY likes markers." I thought, thats because she doesn't get to use markers much at home or she ends up like this! Oh Zoya girl....you keep us on our toes thats for sure.