Torrential Downpour

Tonight I went to Wegmans to get some dinner.  When I went inside the weather was sunny and warm...unusual for this time of year...so warm I had the air conditioning on in my car.  I was inside for only 10 minutes.  When I came out, it was raining buckets.  The raindrops were the size of peanut m&ms. I stood there thinking "seriously?" I couldn't believe how drastically the weather had changed in just 10 minutes. I waited a minute but the rain only seemed to be getting worse.  I could stand there and wait or run to my car. I hesitated because I had flip flops on and I knew my feet would get soaked.  I pictured myself slipping and falling.  Other people were either waiting under the awning or getting umbrellas from inside.  Nobody was in the rain.  Everyone was avoiding it.  It seemed they were all protected...waiting for someone to drive up to their rescue or having the shelter of an umbrella.  I felt completely unprepared for the rain and since I was all alone I had nobody to go and get my car.  I decided to run....fast....and in less than 30 seconds I was completely drenched....my hair, my clothes, my feet, my face...all of me. The rain drops were so heavy and I couldn't even try to dodge them.  They were big and wet and smacking me in the face.  I felt exposed, unprotected, and alone....being the only one who decided to run through the rain.

I got to my car and jumped in as fast as I could.  I put my key in and turned on the car. The air conditioning was still on and from being so wet I was freezing.  I turned the heat on and just sat in my car feeling happy to have it's protection from the rain.  I was also feeling a little annoyed that it seemed I was the only one who got soaked.  Everyone else had a better plan and escaped the rain one way or another.  I was kind of mad at myself for running through the rain and not coming up with a better plan.  I don't know why but I just sat there in my car until the rain ended...about ten minutes. The sound of the rain was soothing, now that I was finally under shelter.  It went from pouring and a black sky, to a steady rain with overcast clouds, to light sprinkles with the sunshine peeking through, to no rain with rays of sun shining down again.  My wet clothes clung to me and I shivered the whole way home...even though I felt uncomfortable I felt happy that the rain had stopped and I had found shelter and I was able to put warm dry clothes on once I got home.

I sat there thinking of how this last 15 minutes paralleled our adoption pretty accuractely. So many times it has gone from sunny skies and warm temperatures to freezing rain and black skies...all in the blink of an eye.  During the adoption process, I have felt alone, exposed, drenched, annoyed, and lacking a "plan" at times.  I have looked around to see others who are adopting having an easier time...having a plan to escape the rain...having an umbrella to keep from getting hit with the enormous obstacles falling from the sky....and wondering why it seems I'm the one who keeps getting caught in the storm and having to run for cover.  I can relate this to my relationship with God on this journey.  Every time a storm comes I try to come up with a plan on my own and end up getting soaked.  It usually takes me some time to remember that I have the shelter of the Lord.  From the time it takes me to remember this, I get caught in the storm, feeling alone and uncomfortable, but I always find shelter in his arms...although usually not before getting drenched  from trying out my own plan.  Just like the storm today, every time we've had a "torrential downpour" in our adoption process, the sun has always come back out in the end.  I take comfort in knowing that no matter how bad the storm, the sun eventually comes out and dries up any traces of the rain.  Even when I get caught in the storm, I'm never soaked forever.  God is great and he has been my shelter, he has given me warm, dry clothes to put on after each storm I get caught in.  Sometimes it's my own fault I get caught in the storm...but it doesn't matter to him how many times I forget to seek His shelter and cause myself to get caught in the storm...he is always there in the end. 

Discouraged

Quite the day already and it is only noon.  Some days I feel defeated and wonder why not one part of this process can be easy.  We got an email from our facilitator today saying that the Vital Statistics office in Zoya's home town has not had power for 7 days and they don't know if it will be back on by Tuesday the 13th in order to process Zoya's birth certificate.  The one and only woman who is allowed to print her birth certificate is also having a baby in the hospital right now.  This would not fly in America....but Ukraine is NOT America.  Our facilitator said she doesn't know what to tell us and we can either still fly out Sunday and maybe have to stay for who knows how much longer than the week and a half we were planning and wait until the power comes back on, all the time having no clue if that will take days or weeks, or we can stay home longer and wait to hear.  I'm almost in tears.  I just spent the whole day yesterday making appointments for the week after we were supposed to be home, and now we may not even be home.  I just want to get her and bring her home! This is supposed to be the "easy" part of the process, if there is an easy part.  Every time I start to let my guard down just the teeniest bit something like this happens.  I think I will be in such disbelief the day we are allowed to walk out of the orphanage with her!  Please pray that this issue will be resolved quickly and we don't have to change or flights again and delay getting Zoya home even more :( 

Here are a few videos that I uploaded.  Watching them and thinking we might not get to her as soon as we though breaks my heart.

This is the first time Zoya ever laughed!


Here is Zoya dropping her toys again and cracking up!


Here is her little tongue.


Zoya following directions in her walker!

Doctors and More Shoes

Today I got a lot done but it didn't come easy! I spent most of the day on the phone getting Zoya on our insurance, setting up an intake meeting for Early Intervention Services, setting up an appointment with the International Adoption Clinic in Pittsburgh, contacting the Down Syndrome Clinic at Children's Hospital in Pittsburgh, and the most fun of all......trying to find a pediatrician for Zoya unsuccessfully might I add! 3 different doctors "declined" her.  I'm pretty sure at least 2 of those doctors declined her because she has Down Syndrome. The conversations all went something like this:

Me:      Hi is Dr. ** taking new patients?

Them:  What insurance do you have?
Me:      Highmark PPO Blue

Them:  Yes Dr. * is.

Me:     Okay, we just adopted her from Ukraine, she is 22 months old and has Down Syndrome and a heart condition that has been surgically corrected.

Them:  Umm let me get back to you.

Time ticks away....I call back......and bug them.....

Them:     Dr. so and so declined to take her as a patient

Me:       Okay, are there other doctors in this practice who would take her?

Them:    Yes I will have to get back to you

Me:      Okay thank you.

Them:    (getting back to me) He also declined

Me:       (hangup and call the next one)

The other conversation was similar and the doctor was taking new patients (I even said she was 22 months old) until the words Down Syndrome came out at which point the lady put me on hold and another lady came on and said, Ohh Dr. ** is only taking newborns, sorry.  Hmmph.  So tomorrow I'm back at it and after contacting friends and other parents, have gotten a couple more names to try.  If not, we will find someone in Pittsburgh to do all the initial appointments with her, and then when we get everything squared away we will transfer to someone in Erie who maybe isn't as good as what we'd hope for, but will be okay just dealing with the typical sicknesses and things. 

We did make a little time to do another shopping trip.  We bought some storage bins for the playroom and filled them up with all the toys we've already collected.  I have so many toys and therapy tools from teaching Life Skills...so it was fun to get all of those out!  We took a side trip to Old Navy :)  We found a dress on clearance that looks similar to the famous blue dress we met Zoya in.  We are going to take it to the orphanage and ask them if we can trade it and keep the blue dress.  I'd like to have the dress for the memory of that first meeting and our time there.  It is special to us.  Hopefully they will agree to swap.  I'm looking for another "winter-ish" dress so I can give the a 2 for 1 deal! Shawn told me I'm not allowed to buy anymore pink shoes (although he thought they were really cute)....so I bought a pair of PURPLE SANDALS! Hehe.  See?

On a different note.....a lot of people have asked me why the videos we posted on the blog were so short.  That would be because our connection in Ukraine was terrible and it took 10 minutes to upload a 30 second video and we were paying for internet by the minute.  So I have some longer ones that I will start posting.  YouTube is not working again tonight, so I will try tomorrow :) 

We had a nice night out with some friends and it was so great to share our experience in Ukraine.  It is amazing to see how it is moving others! We are so ready to have this special little celebrity home....she definitely has a fan club!!

Pink Shoes and Sunshine

It was a completely exhausting day and the only reason my eyes are still open now is because my brain will NOT shut down...my body is barely hangin in there, but my brain...that evil brain....is keeping me from resting!

I called the pediatrician to try to get an appointment for Zoya and am still waiting to hear back.  Also trying to decide if I want to call the International Adoption Clinic in Pittsburgh and set up an appointment there, or if we should start with the pedi...not sure.  Spent some time researching how to get Zoya a social security card and will try to put her on our insurance tomorrow.  Got caught up on a couple bills, did 2 more loads of laundry (Zoya's things), put some finishing touches (although still not finished) on Zoya's bedroom, organized her play room a bit, had lunch with a great friend, had a doctor appointment for myself (3 weeks of eating no vegetables and my body is NOT happy with me), uploaded 800 pictures from Ukraine to the Walmart website only to find out they wanted to charge me $30 for shipping, and went shopping for Zoya girl for about 3 hours! How is that for a full day?

The little things make me happy lately....like pink shoes.  When I got home from shopping I thought I only bought 3 pair of shoes for Zoya but when I started unpacking the bags I realized I actually bought 4 pair...and they all are either pink or have pink in the pattern! I will probably never buy Zoya red shoes because that will remind me of her pathetic orphanage shoes that don't even fit! Apparently though, I like pink shoes :)  See? I bet she will like them too!

Pair #1....

Pair #2....

Pair #3....

Pair #4....

What can I say? They were all on sale ;)

So even though I had an incredibly busy day, at the end of the day two things made me really happy: pink shoes and the wonderful sunshine and warmth we had all day today! Driving with my windows down and smelling fresh air (missed that very much in Ukraine) was enough to make this day awesome! Zoya loves Sunny Days too...see?

Also on sale ;)

Oh...and I also put this stencil on Zoya's wall today....I love the saying....

I also put out the Matryoshka Dolls that we bought for Zoya in Ukraine

Our house is almost as ready as our hearts are for Zoya to come home!! We will definitely be doing more baby proofing than we thought since she is movin' and shakin' a lot more than we thought she would be!

There's No Place Like Home!....A New Perspective

Oh my....being home is so absolutely wonderfully amazing! The 2 straight days of travel were well worth is, but we are missing our girl like crazy already! I have lists everywhere, things I need to do, to buy, people to call, so much to do in the next 6 days! We are leaving back to Ukraine on Sunday, April 11th.  We will get into Ukraine on Monday, April 12th, take the night train back to Zoya's region and get there at 7am Tuesday morning, just in time to begin all of the "after court" paperwork.  Tuesday is the first day after the 10 day wait period that we are allowed to start paperwork.  We will likely be in her region until Sunday, possibly Monday.  We will then break her out of the orphanage and take her on the 8 hour night train back to Kiev and take 2 days to get a medical and do US Embassy and visa "stuff."  Hoping to be home with her April 22 or 23!! If anyone has any ideas for our airplane rides (totalling about 15 hours) for a very active 22 month old....PLEASE let me know :)

We came home to a very nice homecoming! Our wonderful friend Jen house and doggy sat for us while we were gone.  We are so lucky to have her! We came home to lots of yummy food (taco dip, pasta salad, cake), a cute little Easter Basket, a wonderfully CLEAN house, fresh flowers, and a bunch of other cute little "welcome home" touches. 

Our neighbors were so nice and took down our CHRISTMAS lights while we were gone.  Yah, we meant to get around to that, but we've been just a little busy...hehe.  They also made these cute banners and put them on our garage doors.  It really made us smile when we pulled into the driveway!

We have the best neighbors!!!

I have spent some time looking at our over 700 pictures and videos we took during our trip to Ukraine.  I cannot believe how much Zoya has changed from the first day we met her.  She is honestly a different child.  She is already becoming the child she was always meant to be.  I look at the videos from our first meeting and compare them to the videos of our most recent times together, and it makes me both happy and sad. 

Happy because I can see what a big difference love alone can make in the life of a child.  Happy because I can see her bond forming so strongly with us.  Happy because I know we've already made a huge difference in her life, and she in ours.  Happy because from this point on, the three of us are forever changed for the better. 

Sad because also floating in the back of my mind is the thought of all the millions of other orphans who will never become the children they were created to become because they will die before every knowing the love of parents.  Sad because thinking about how love is already transofrming Zoya also reminds me of how many of these orphans will never transform...how their true personalities will never be cultivated....Sad because they will never experience the joy that Zoya is already beginning to experience....Sad because the world will never have the opportunity to appreciate so many of these beautiful children.  Sad because our eyes have been ripped wide open and forced to realize that many of these orphans will go unnoticed, disregarded, overlooked, unseen, and at the end of all of that....they will go unchanged.

That is how this entire journey has been....bittersweet.  Although we had so many happy, blissful, exhilirating moments with Zoya in Ukraine, there are undertones of sadness, feelings of helplessness, and traces of heart-wrenching visions...flashbacks of neglected children whom the world will never even know exist.  I am still raw with emotion and trying to process all that we experienced.  I don't know what to do with this new perspective.  I don't know how to make this crisis better.  I don't know what to do to fix the problem.  I don't know how to save these children.  The worst feeling I've had of all is the overwhelming fear that I can't make this better, or fix the problem, or save these children.  What I can do is share our story and our experience and maybe open a few eyes to what is happening to these children across the world...but it doesn't seem like enough.  I know it is not enough.  Even with all of the joy and happiness we've experienced since we met Zoya, that gut-wrenching sick feeling will not leave...even when I close my eyes....it doesn't go away.  The worst part of all is that these feeling I'm having don't even compare to the sadness and distress these orphans must feel day after day.  I asked God to give me His eyes during this trip and he has. Before we left I listened to this song over and over:

Give Me Your Eyes by Brandon Heath

Give me your eyes for just one second
Give me your eyes so I can see

Everything that i keep missing

Give me your love for humanity

Give me your arms for the broken hearted

The ones that are far beyond my reach

Give me your heart for the one's forgotten

Give me your eyes so I can see

Sometimes, I'm ashamed to admit, that I wish I never saw what I saw because it was so much easier not knowing.  It is a heavy burden to carry.  Of course in the end, I feel priviledged that God thought enough of me to share the story of the orphans.  He thinks enough of me that I deserve to be blessed by being Zoya's moma and has planted a seed in me that will hopefully grow into something great.  God has a plan and has shown us these things for a reason.  Until He reveals His bigger plan to us, we will enjoy our ray of sunshine and marvel at the awesome things God has done in our lives, and in Zoya's.

WE MADE IT HOME!

Dear Friends and Family.....
Going on 42 hours of no sleep but we are soooooo excited to be home! 4 plane rides and a car ride from Buffalo later....we are HOME SWEET HOME!  I almost cried when I saw Mya dog and she was going CRAZY when she saw us.  We definitely miss our Zoya girl and didn't realize how hard it would be to leave, but also feel we made the right decision by coming home for a much needed recharge period.  I have missed the comforts of home SOOOO very much and am more thankful now than I've ever been for everything and everyone we have in our lives.  I am embarrassed to admit that I even kissed my washing machine and dryer when I got home! I will never complain about having to do laundry again...because doing laundry with a washer and dryer is EASY!  Thank you to all of you for all of your prayers and support.  We are so lucky to have gotten closer to friends and family through this process, and to meet so many new wonderful people! We have a million things to do this week in preparation of Zoya's homecoming but I plan to try to blog once a day....there are so many things to write about....so many realizations we have had on our journey home.  Looking back already, we are truly amazed that all of this has happened and amazed by all the little miracles along the way.  It seems surreal that she is really ours and we can't imagine what it will feel like to break her out of the orphanage SOON! Thank you, thank you, thank you to all of you....without you this journey would not have happened! We look forward to your continued prayers and support as we finally BRING ZOYA HOME!

With Love,
Sarah and Shawn

Introducing......

In the eyes of God, all of us....and NOW THE COURT.....Miss Zoya Faith Basile is officially ours!!! We still have to wait 10 days during the wait/appeals period before we can take her but she is legally our little girl! What a long day and quite the story to tell....God is amazing and performed some miracles today. 

We arrived at the court at 8:00, an hour early.  We waited and waited and waited for everyone to arrive.  For court in Ukraine, there are "witnesses" that must be present.  Their role is not to decide the case, but they are allowed to ask any questions and give their opinion.  They were the same witnesses from Tuesday.  While we were waiting, one of the witnesses, a woman in her 60s, sat down next to us.  She hadn't been very friendly on Tuesday, but then again nobody here really is.  I noticed a lanyard sticking out of her purse and it had the word, "miracle," just as I was praying that everything would go well today.  I thought it was pretty neat and pointed it out to shawn.  I knew it was a sign!...........

Anyways, the judge finally graced us with his presence around 9:30, a half hour late.  We were really nervous. They went throug the entire part of court that they already did on Tuesday.  Asked us our full names, places of birth, where we live, and what we do for a living.  Then they read aloud our petition asking to adopt Zoya, and did another role call where every person in court introduced themselves by giving all the same information we just gave.  They asked, which one wants to go first (before the firing squad hehe) and Shawn stood up.  The judge simply said, tell me all about you and why you are here.  Thank goodness our facilitator gave us some questions to answer one at a time.  Shawn did well and spoke from his heart.  Even though our facilitator was translating everything we were told only to look at the judge the entire time (which we did EVEN when he was staring out the window looking bored!).  Next was my turn.  I told all about the programs we are involved in and told the judge, prosecutor, witnesses, and everyone else how these children really do have a future in America.  I noticed one of the witnesses looking at me like I was bonkers....well they both kind of were at one point or another.  Next it was the social workers turn.  She gave all the information about why and how Zoya became an orphan and her "diagnosis." Next was the representative from the orphanage...which was my favorite part.  She told the judge that we met Zoya on March 17th and visited her every day, twice a day, since then.  She told the judge that Zoya gets excited when we come, she recognizes us, and knows that we are "her people"and she knows she belongs with us.  That about made me cry.  The prosecutor only had one question for each of us (which I hear is UNHEARD OF from this prosecutor).  The judge took about 30 minutes to read aloud all of our documents.  He went over EVERY SINGLE ONE and let me tell you there were a TON! When he was going through the papers, he pulled out the pictures we had printed for him.  He smiled a teeny tiny smile, like he was trying not to, and then passed them to the witnesses.  The witnesses both smiled.  Here a smile means A LOT.  Nobody here fakes a smile.  When you see one, it is most definitely real!

The judge said he needed a 5 minute break.  Our facilitator looked worried.  They called the prosecutor out and then our facilitator.  We listened to the other people inside the court room saying something....we didn't know what the buzz was all about.  She came back to tell us that he wanted an offical stamp on one of the papers.  Everyone else agreed it didn't need a stamp because it was on official letterhead from the hospital where Zoya was born.  Even the prosecutor said it wasn't needed.  He said basically that her didn't care and he wanted the stamp.  Marina begged him to just finish court and make a decision TODAY and told him we would go right after court and get 2 stamps even! LOL.  Somehow, HE AGREED!  He took another 5 minute break to make his decision.  He came back in with the witnesses, who were all smiling now...big change! He read his decision and I knew it was coming because when he said it in Ukranian, everyone started smiling, but still we waited to hear it translated in English.  The court granted us our request to become Zoya's parents!!!! Shawn and I teared up big time and squeezed each other's hand.  Once he was done talking we hugged each other and our facilitator.  Everyone was all smiles now, even the judge!! Court finished at approximately 11:45....only 2 hours and 15 minutes!

So we were off for the hour drive to the hospital where Zoya was born.  Our facilitator called ahead and said she was the assistant to the judge and we were holding up court to get this document done and could they please stamp it as soon as we get there.  They agreed!!  Our facilitator is THE BEST.  So we took the drive there going 140km/hour....which is almost 90 miles per hour...and made it there in 40 minutes. We drove back to bring the stamped. document to the judge. On the way we stoped at the social worker's office to drop something off.  Our facilitator came out and said everyone was buzzing about "how in the world did you get the judge to have such a quick court and make the decision today?"  First I thought, "that was quick??!!!"  And I guess where we are, it is quick.  Having ONLY 2 court dates here is a victory.  I said it must have been all the prayers. 

Next we dropped the newly stamped paper off to the judge.  While our facilitator was inside one of the witnesses, who is also a janitor in the court, stopped her.  She said how in her head she was thinking this was a crazy idea that we wanted this child, but after listening to us and seeing the pictures, she knew in her heart "we must let this child go with them."  She said the judge asked her, a cleaning lady (and witness of course) what she thought about the case and if he should make a decision today! She was suprised that the judge asked her opinion and she said, yes I think we should.  Remember the lady with the "miracle" lanyard hanging out of her purse? I told our facilitator I thought she seemed very nice today as opposed to our first court.  She said her and the other witness were both annoyed that they had to come in and hear a case on an adoption of a child with Down Syndrome.  Here that is unheard of and "stupid." The miracle here is the God changed their hearts....softened their hearts for our case.  Usually the witnesses don't do much, but in our case the judge asked their opinion and I believe it was through them that the judge decided to give us a decision today. The lady with the "miracle" lanyard couldn't have been happier for us, when just days before she was so annoyed with us and our desire to adopt a child with Down Syndrome.  Our facilitator reminded us that we really are pioneers here and since this was the first adoption of a child with special needs in this area, people are still confused and leery of us.  I am so glad to know that God has used us to open eyes here.  I wonder if the judge will remember us and Zoya years from now as his first adoption of a child with special needs...hopefully years from now there will have been many more of these adoptions and maybe it won't be so taboo!

So many more thoughts racing through my head...but we are packing to leave TONIGHT! We got a flight out of here into Kiev and a flight from Kiev to Frankfurt to Chicago to Buffalo...getting in at 5:06 home time tomorrow! So excited. Off to pack, one last visit with Zoya, then outta here for 10 days :)  I will probably have some more organized thoughts when my mind isn't racing a million miles a minute...so sorry for the scattered post :)

Pictures from Yesterday

Here are the pictures I couldn't get to upload last night! So cute :)

She wasn't just making a crazy face here she was half way through a yawn LOL.

Thats our Zoya girl!  Court is in about an hour and my tummy is feeling nervous! Thank you for the prayers.  I will update as soon after court as I can.  I am expecting it to last about an hour and a half.

Day 20, the night before court #2

It is about 7:15 pm here and I don't know if either of us will sleep much tonight.  We are getting picked up at 7:50 tomorrow morning and will wait at the court house for about an hour while our facilitator runs around picking up all the other people who have to be there again (prosecutor, social worker/inspector, orphanage representative).  Court is at 9am (as long as the judge is on time), which would be 2am home time.  We were able to work our a flight into Buffalo instead of Erie and it is "on hold" for us IF court finishes tomorrow!  For those of you who haven't traveled yet, I can't tell you enough how amazing Golden Rule Travel Agency is.  They are used to working with adoptive families and Eldon is simply wonderful! The thought of coming home is so great, but I try not to think about it for too long because we really have no idea what will happen tomorrow.  I don't want to get my hopes up, but of course they already are.  We are all thinking positive and the important people are saying they "think" everything should go well tomorrow.  I guess it all depends on which side of the bed the judge wakes up on and if he had enough coffee or not.  The other family who was here is turning down their referral so it's back to just us at this orphanage again. 

We visited with Zoya tonight and she was so stinkin cute! She is babbling more and imitating sounds and small words.  She is giggling a lot and happy to see us when we come.  I just wish we had a room to play with her in...with something other than a cement floor.  She is very distracted with all the workers in and out and she ALWAYS has to know what is going on around her!  We got a couple cute videos tonight of Little Miss Zoya. 

In this video, Zoya thought it was hillarious when I tried to pull the binky out because it made a funny sound. Then she would bite down on it so I couldn't get it and laugh even harder when I tried to pull it out but couldn't! At the end you can see her turn around because she heard someone behind her.


This is another cute video of Zoya running from Daddy in her walker. At the end he scared her but didn't mean to. She thought it was funny and cracked up!

And some pictures....

So Happy!

Okay, Blogger is having issues AGAIN...so I will try later to upload the other photos...check back!

Zoya Made a New Friend Today

Much to my dismay, Zoya has already made a friend that I don't approve of.....BARNEY! Ahhhh! We took the DVD player over on our visit today and put in a Barney DVD...she was amazed! She loved all the singing and dancing and even learned to clap her hands to the music! She would dance back and forth and then just stop and stare in amazement! She kept getting really close to the DVD player and even kissing it! haha.  When we were given her medical information one thing that was said was translated as: "Zoya has far vision." We don't know if that means she is near sighted, or far sighted...I'm thinking probably near sighted and it just came out wrong in the translation? She seemed to like getting VERY close to the screen, which reminds me of another certain little boy I know who shall remain nameless...all I will say is he loves McDonalds...and we miss him very much...hehe :) Either way we will have her vision checked when we get home! She loves to feel the vibration of things that make sounds...even the DVD player. She kept putting her hands and face right on the DVD player.

I was singing to her...she absolutely loves music!

We were really excited that she didn't seem tired at all today, and then while watching Barney, in like 2 seconds flat, she went from this:

to this......

in 2 seconds flat!

We knew we'd be busted since we were still inside so I tried to wake her up by calling her name...useless I tell ya! Then the "oppsite of favorite" caretaker came in and started SHOUTING her name and she woke up she kept waking up then falling asleep....kinda reminded me of being in college, really really tired, and not being able to keep your eyes open....they would open then her head would go down and eyes shut.  Shawn and I couldn't help but laugh out loud while this lady was SCREAMING at Zoya and Zoya's head kept bobbing up and down...eyes wide open, then shut....repeat!  The lady didn't like that we were laughing and just got louder and louder. The care taker was NOT happy so she went over to the sink, got some cold water and slapped it onto Zoya's face a couple times.  I didn't know if I should laugh or cry.  I felt like slapping the lady but I refrained from doing that for obvious reasons.  Seriously, whenever she falls asleep (although we have been trying not to let her but it doesn't seem to make a difference...she will sleep sitting up, upside down, laying down...whatever position she is in)...anyways, when she falls asleep I feel like Shawn and I are the two guys from "My Cousin Bernie" trying to make her "look alive" behind the steering wheel! LOL.  We are realizing that there are a few care takers who let her sleep when she is tired and a few who will do ANYTHING to keep her awake. 

Tomorrow at 9am our time is our 2nd (and hopefully final) court date.  We are nervous and anxious to have this court date and hoping that God will give us the words we need when we are being questioned by the judge and give the judge a soft spot in his heart for this adoption.  We need prayers for our facilitator, Marina, as well, as this is a new situation for her and we know she has done everything she can to help this court date be our final one.  We hope and pray that tomorrow is the day that Zoya will be ours, not only in our eyes and God's eyes, but in the eyes of the court as well.  Thank you for your kind words and continued prayers.