My First Mother's Day

Today was a bittersweet day.  So sweet because I got to celebrate my first Mother's Day as a new mommy to the best daughter in the whole world! Sweet because I have only been her Mommy (officially) for 5 weeks. Sweet because during that time I have watched her blossom before my very eyes.  Sweet because I am the one who was chosen to take away Zoya's motherless days.  Sweet because Zoya will never be without a Momma again. Sweet because I am the one who will forevermore laugh with her, wipe away her tears, cheer her on from the sidelines, kiss her boo boos, rock her to sleep each night, sing to her, and love on her like there's no tomorrow! 

Bitter in some senses as well.  I couldn't help but think today about Zoya's biological mother.  I know they don't celebrate Mother's Day in Ukraine, but it reminded me that Zoya's biological mother will experience many holidays, including Zoya's upcoming birthday, without her.  I can't help but wonder if her biological Mom is sad, if she thinks about the baby she left at the hospital due to her Down Syndrome, if she prays for her, if she wonders where in this world she is living, if she wonders if Zoya has found a Momma to love her unconditionally....if she stays awake at night dreaming of what Zoya looks like and what her personality is like.  I can't help but think she must wonder about Zoya...even if it is only a passing thought once in a blue moon.  So today, as I celebrated being Zoya's Mother...in every sense of the word...I thought about the woman who gave birth to her and am so thankful for this woman because she gave us the greatest gift we've ever received.  I wish she could know how loved and treasured Zoya is and how her life has changed so many already.  I wish she could know that she played a part in changing so many lives by giving birth to this angel. 

Remember THIS MOM that I posted about? We originally thought her child was a boy, but we found out she is a little girl who is listed on Reece's Rainbow.  Today I also thought about that Mom at the orphanage who came to visit her daughter that she had to leave there.  She had to leave her daughter because she has Down Syndrome and in Ukraine, there is no possible way to keep a child with Down Syndrome, even if one wanted to, as this mother clearly does.  It is almost impossible due to medical costs, lack of programs for the children, no school for them to attend, and the fact that it is not acceptable to their society to keep a "broken" child.  I thought about how this mom wishes so badly for her daughter to find a family, because that is the only option.  If she does not find a family, she will live (and die) in an orphanage or mental institution.  I can't imagine being the mom who gave birth to this girl and having that fate to face. Please look at this sweet soul and say a prayer for her on this Mother's Day to find a Mommy to take her home! Please pray for her Mom as well as I cannot even imagine the heartbreak she is going through! Take a minute to look at her beautiful face...She is listed under "orphanage 2" and her name is Anna.  Pray for this sweet girl!
Zoya (and Shawn) made the day very special.  Zoya (Shawn) picked out a beautiful necklace with Zoya's birthstone (a pearl) and brought it to me in bed this morning! Zoya thought the necklace was a perfect gift because it was meant for me to wear close to my heart and "it's fragile just like I was and very beautiful just like me." That's what the card from Zoya (Shawn) said.  What a thoughtful daughter (husband) I have!

Mother's Day 2010 Pictures:

Her shirt says, "Mommy's Little Girl"

Cracking up!

Love that smile!

Later I changed her into this dress:

This is the first clothing item we bought.  Before we even committed to adopt Zoya, Shawn and I were in the mall and I saw this outfit.  I stopped and just stared at it and said to Shawn, "Wouldn't this look cute on a little Ukranian orphan?"  He agreed.  We walked away from it, but after we committed to her I found it on sale and had to get it!

Thanks for being the one to make my first (of many) mother's day so special Zoya girl! I love you.