Ever since I can remember I've had strange dreams...and lots of them! Since committing to Zoya I've had some weird dreams. One where she was the size of a barbie doll and another where she was very roly-poly!
The other night I had dream that I was teaching my 2nd graders about baby chics. The eggs were in canisters like tennis balls come in. I was passing two eggs out to each student for them to study. Suddenly Shawn was there and looking through all the eggs for the perfect one. I pulled out several that I thought looked good, but none of them looked good enough to him. Finally, I found a golden egg and excitely showed it to Shawn...he said, "this will do." He proceeded to pull back the gold film that was on the egg and the egg suddently became see-through. Inside we could see the tiniest little perfect chic dancing around. We were amazed to see that the chic was perfect and miniature size. We couldn't figure out why, if the chic looked ready to come out, it was just dancing around inside the egg. We sat and waited, thinking it would come out soon. It didn't. We waited and waited and waited. We had the idea to try to break open the egg ourselves but didn't in fear that we would hurt the chic. We knew that we had to wait for the chic to come out and there was nothing we could do to make it happen any sooner. I remember my heart just aching and longing for the egg to hatch and feeling so helpless. Some other weird things happened but the chic did not come out of the egg in my dream :( I woke up very sad and wishing I could see the chic hatch.
I guess this dream could represent us waiting for our little chic to become ours. We see her in a picture, feel her in our hearts, and know she is already alive and just waiting to break out of her egg. Shawn choosing the egg could represent how he felt so strongly that Zoya was "our egg." I had showed him many pictures of orphans needing homes and he passed on all of them until he saw Zoya. I think the shell of the egg represents the barrier between us and Zoya...the paperwork, the funds, the travel, the physical distance...and all of that. Zoya can't break out of her egg by herself...she needs us there. We can't break her out of the egg by ourselves either...we need God to do that part for us. And He will....in His time. The waiting part is just so hard. We can see ourselves looking at our chic inside her egg every day with heartache and there is nothing she can do or we can do to get her out...we have to trust in God that he will get her out of the egg so we can have her in our arms. In the dream, even though the chic couldn't get out of her egg, she was dancing happily....not worrying about how she was going to get out of the egg...almost having a peace that her time would come. That gives me great comfort, thinking....maybe....Zoya feels peace somewhere in her heart and knows her time is coming to hatch our of her egg, meet her forever family, and start LIVING outside the egg.